sugar coated

I cant stop thinking I'm annoyed!
I want everyone to go away or just .......
I wish for things that are no good for me but it makes me feel so perfect am i lying to myself. If so i cant be mad if ur a liar I'm no better then you......................

Alls fair in love and war!

put up the peace sign put yo index down

I'm like only listening to gym class heroes for some reason oh and fall out boy sometimes with other stuff sprinkled in ok I'm listening to lots of stuff but mostly gch ! sooo reading my diary / notebook of random writing thought i would share of course cause at night i don't like to talk i like to type (and touch maybe ) -side note lol these are from all over last year and this year so they may not go with the way i feel now there just thoughts i was having :p

~i thought i knew you

i know nothing

i feel nothing

i hear.......

everything

so watch yo

mouth ~

you don't even know
I'm going to ruin
you

mostly......... because i can

heartless

maybe

cold
of course
oh baby
i burn !

baby we belong alone

its the way we were made
that's why we always end up

together

blah anyway how was your day uh huh that's nice . i think my insides may have exploded but i mean i don't want to actually find out so if i drop dead that's probably why. my new fave obsession besides Travis McCoy (can we all just stop and picture him right now hmmmm awesome) anyways its brave new voices this show about slam poetry and teenagers they are sooooo good it makes me jealous and proud at the same time. It also has started my new crush on this 19 year old boy named b. young hes so cute and broken and creative hes just hot!

so lets recap

i love TRAVIS MCCOY from GCH he curses and he has lots of tattoos and he use to date Katy perry (boooo) and i love him :)

i also love b. young from brave new voices -the show rocks u should watch (if ur into emotional teenage poetry) it comes on HBO

i pretty much hate you

and ............ ummm suck it :)

Quote of the day -in the book of life the answers aren't in the back-charlie brown

song u should listen to :) - winter song by Sara berellies also sung on MTV by Mia it was awesome

This is my winter song to you. The storm is coming soon, It rolls in from the sea
My voice; a beacon in the night. My words will be your light,To carry you to me.
Is love alive? Is love alive? Is love
They say that things just cannot grow Beneath the winter snow, Or so i have been told.
They say were buried far, Just like a distant star I simply cannot hold.
Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?
This is my winter song. December never felt so wrong, Cause you're not where you belong; Inside my arms.
I still believe in summer days.The seasons always change And life will find a way.
Ill be your harvester of light And send it out tonight So we can start again.
Is love alive?Is love alive?Is love alive?

listening to.............

"The Queen And I"

~gym class heroes~

I love it how she breathes booze in the mornin'
Man, it's so sexy how she can't remember last night
I made a fatal mistake letting her drink again
But who the hell am I to tell her how to live her life?

And if you could put dumb in a shot glass
I'm just another lush who's had one too many in me
And we please don't have enough
I see you stand there, settle for anything, anything's better than lettin' her,
Think she could do better than me
She'll come around eventually'

Cause baby girl's a queen
But the queen is just a pawn with a bunch of fancy moves
And she's made me a fiendI'm going through withdrawals 'cause
I got nothing to lose

Oh no,She's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallow
From being, oh, so hollow
(Hey! Hey! Hey!)
Bravo, she's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallow
From being, oh, so hollow

I find it funny she can never find her car keys
Immediately after telling me she can't take it
She makes the cutest faces when she screams obscenities
And slurs her words because she's never not inebriated
And the front page headline read
Let the girl go, you know you can do better
It's bad, when the fact that you can't have her
Is the reason you sweat her,
Don't let her take advantage of you
Like the other dudes let her
You better cut your losses now buddy.'

Cause baby girl's a queen
And a queen's a pawn with a bunch of fancy moves
And she's made me a fiend
I'm going through withdrawals '
cause I got nothing to lose

Oh no,She's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallowFrom being, oh, so hollow
(Hey! Hey! Hey!)
Bravo, she's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallow
From being, oh, so hollow

Drown yourself,It's not worth keeping me
Just put it down right now,
And bow out gracefully
('Cause baby girl's a queen
The queen's just a pawn with a bunch of fancy moves
And she's made me a fiend
I'm going through withdrawals 'cause I got nothing to lose)

Oh no,She's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallow
From being, oh, so hollow
(Hey! Hey! Hey!)
Bravo, she's at the bottom of that bottle
She's only one more swallow
From being, oh, so hollow
(Hey! Hey! Hey!...)

I dont know

I'm clumsy

very clumsy as a matter of fact

i broke a wine glass yesterday while cleaning the table.

I'm weird as I'm sure you can tell .......

i have lots of secrets ,use to be a protection thing when i was little (i was very different but didn't want anyone to know) now its just a habit and kinda fun.

I'm very comfortable with who i am

and don't think i could change for anyone else unless i really wanted to.

i hate Wednesdays ,love Thursdays and Sunday

every other day is just a day

I'm kind of a day to day person i don't like to plan

it makes me anxious

i don't like to lie I'll just not answer

i feel if i lie then I'll be misunderstood

i hate to be misunderstood

..................................................................

so far i like you...... right...... but I'm not sure ill ever be good at being a

"GIRLFRIEND"

yuck even the word makes me cringe

i hate labels

I'm sorry to say it doesn't get any easier with me

i don't force things if it happens it happens

i cant explain exactly how i feel about you

becauseeeeee I'm not sure yet

when i figure it out

you will be the first to know:)

am i your anything

shit i haven't written since forever and a day
I'm angry, why? i have nooooooo idea
I'm mad at everyone i know everyone i knew everyone i might know soon
Ive completely cut off contact with everyone almost or is it the other way around
I'm finding myself more rebellious doing things Even I'm ashamed of
good thing i guess is I'm going to school in a month

i will never ask if you don't tell me i know you well enough to know you never loved me

i am sooo anti relationships its not funny i just don't understand why now why when I'm so young and so stupid that if you don't break us i will i can handle the pressure thee stress
i cant lose myself for someone else right now i don't Even know who i am yet
I'm sooo into myself that i don't Even miss missing you anymore
im in no rush to do anything ...................................

xoxo